


I Love You More Than Words Can Say

by Mishastiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Falling In Love, First Time, Love Letters, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-05
Updated: 2014-04-05
Packaged: 2018-01-18 05:27:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1416778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mishastiel/pseuds/Mishastiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel decides its time he did something sweet for Dean... so he writes him a love letter...</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Love You More Than Words Can Say

**Author's Note:**

  * For [elimy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elimy/gifts).



> Hi everyone! This is my first fanfic so please no hate! Anyways this is for my lovely friend!!! Also this took me a really long time to write!!!

Dear Dean Winchester,

        The first thing I said to you was "I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition" and the first thing you did was stab me. You were angry and confused; you were a broken man. You didn't want to be saved, but it was to late. I had already staked my claim on you. With the mark on your shoulder I etched and carved a mark into your soul. An eternal claim of what would become love. And I do love you Dean. I wish that I could redeem myself for all the hurt I have inflicted upon you. I wish I was the one being killed instead of you. I wish Naomi could've killed me those thousands of times instead of having to watch the light leave your eyes over and over again. If I could dream, my nightmares would be filled of your frightened face. My wonderful thoughts would be filled with your essence. Even now I think of your smiling face. I think of the time you tried to get me laid (oh the jealousy in your eyes when that female walked to me) and I think of how you told me that I made you laugh-laugh like you hadn't in a long time.

        The truth is Dean, I love you, and I care about you. Words cannot describe how much my heart aches when you close up on yourself. It hurts me to see you injures and tears me to shreds when you cry. Remember when I was human? You have no idea how hard that was for me. I couldn't do anything. I was absolutely useless and got myself killed... And when I drew in breath after breath... After you saved me yet again... My eyes opened and the first image I was gifted with was you sweet face. That time I spent with the angel girl was a futile attempt to clear my thoughts from you, but I just couldn't escape. I thought of you the entire time. Your lips brushing against mine... Your hands soothing me and running over my skin... Giving me goose bumps.

        I remember the first time we made love. It was slow and pleasurable. I remember your hips rocking against mine, your mouth on my neck, and the sweet nothings you whispered in my ears. You were the first to ever tear me apart like that, the first to rip me to shreds each and every time you thrust forward. And then, you would put me back together. You took care of me and I did the same to you.

        I was the first to say those three words. Those three little words that meant the world to you and me… _I Love you_. And then you said it right back. I was so overjoyed! My Dean, my hunter had retaliated my feelings! It was the most wonderful feeling in the world. Thus, our relationship was born. Sam had known about our feelings so our happy announcement only made him chuckle. It was… it was heaven from that point on. We took it slow. A tentative kiss her, a soft sensual touch there, but as long as we were near each other I was happy.

        Our relationship wasn’t perfect. It had times where it was rocky and I was unsure of what to do. Meg confused me. Her feelings of lust and desire left me utterly speechless. I regret kissing her. I regret kissing her right in front of you. I regret hurting you in that moment in time. But I wasn’t the only one who did wrong. You went off with Lisa after Sam went to Hell. You obeyed his wish to have a normal “apple pie life” and you left me. I was in turmoil after that. I was lost. I didn’t know what to do, I didn’t know what to say, and it left me in a bottomless pit of emotion. When Sam came back I was so happy. I thought maybe you would come back, but Sammy never came for you. For a year he was with the rest of the family- he prayed to me and even told Bobby- but never did he go to you. When he did you were head over heels for Lisa… and that hurt even more than when you left. I was broken.

        We fixed our friendship after you came back, but I was still longing for more. I could always see a certain glint in your eyes that told you did to, but you never acted upon it. I believe that was part of the reason why I kissed Meg. I was upset and jealous and still completely in love with you…

        When Lisa was in the hospital you resembled the broken man I raised from Hell. Lisa, your love was dying-going to die- but because of the devotion I still had for you, I saved her. I saved her because you pleaded with me, tears in your eyes, and because I loved you. And then you did something I could not comprehend. You asked me to erase her memories of you. Why Dean? You obviously loved her… and she obviously loved you… I complied and with a gentle touch to her forehead Lisa was no longer a part of the story.

        After that, it took time for your love to blossom again. It was a miracle when I started to see the light come back to your eyes. And words cannot describe how wonderful it was when you kissed me for the first time in a long time. And then you said it… _I love you_ … and I felt my heart bursting with devotion, with care, with desire. We, two halves separated for what seemed to be longer then time itself, were whole again. We fixed our mistakes and we healed our past wounds. For that, I can never repay you for what you have done. Dean Winchester, you have changed my life forever. You took me through a path no angel has ever tread upon. At first I was hesitant, unwilling to betray heaven. At first I was an obedient soldier of heaven. You showed me that of which no one shall ever know. You showed me emotion, feelings… but most of all, you showed me freedom. Dean Winchester you are my first and only love. You will always be in my heart, always seared into my mind. You are the wonderful gift God himself has given me and I thank you. I thank you for the joy you have given me, for the happiness you have granted me, and from the bottom of my heart I say:

**Dean Winchester I love you... So much that it hurts.**

From your one and only,

Castiel, your Angel of the Lord


End file.
